Hayyum Bertie!
Wadda ting widdaah haht-sheet? Whyent ju jas gih evrywuun a haht? Mayk ittah Zydaco Hootananny whahnaht? Misser Roy may'nt be altahgedda mahty pleesed tu loos hes brain surgery bandage thang 'n awl, 'n summa dem Euro boys be loookin a lilbih chili an een needa some trahpicel armatuure 'o such. Buht...
'N whilst ju aht it, cuhd ju plees setta me up widda great Elvis pompadoor and mutton-chops, whaht collah wouldunna be bad needa. Tink a da Pope's flipped up like.
P.S. 'N Weh yoh hat dun gon be at? ...and don't be pullin no funny an givin me lahk wun pontif poiny ting now, right?
P.S.S. I am only posting in inbred, deep Bayou Cajun from now on.