Consequences of a divorce in Indonesia

[pisangkudedek]

I'm considering getting married to my current Indo girlfriend. Obviously before taking such a decision I want to be fully aware of what I'm getting into.
How much can I expect to lose the day we divorce ?
I struggle because so far on the internet I come across contradicting informations.
My main concern is asset division after a divorce. Is there an asset separation matrimonial regime by the way ?
What I clearly need to know is what parts of my net worth are at risk ? Is it only about what I own in Indonesia or in my home country as well ?
Example : what if I own real estate in my home country ? Same question with a portfolio of stocks and bonds in a bank from my home country ?

Also what are the different things I will have to pay afterwards (pension, child support, alimony... ?) and for how many years ? How are those calculated ? The gap in wealth between her and me is huge.
She is protestant if that is relevant. I know there are differences between muslims and non-muslims.

 

[gtrken]

You aren't even married yet and thinking about divorce?
Any prenup you do in Indonesia IMHO is not worth the paper it's printed on.
If you are going to have children you should be expected to pay for their living and full education expenses as you would expect to do in any country , Indonesia or not.
You may not have meant to but your post comes across as very money orientated ( ie. I want the fun but don't want it to cost me) .
If you are that worried about all your assets I suggest you don't marry her and keep the relationship as BF and GF , supply her with a good amount of money to keep her and be happy.

Cheers
Wait till Markit sees this
Ken

 

[spicyayam]

I would suggest doing a consultation with a lawyer, so you know where you stand. I believe that Indonesian law gives a 50-50 split of assets in the case of a divorce. Of course the problem arises that foreigners cannot own property in Indonesia, this is the reason why most mixed couples make a pre-nup stating that property in Indonesia is owned by the Indonesian spouse. Of course you can say what you want in the pre-nup within the law, so you can write what will happen with the Indonesian property if you get a divorce, such as selling the assets.

My wife is a lawyer and she has handled many divorces during this period. My feeling is that the judges are fair and reasonable. There is a process of mediation and while you may have heard of many horror stories about foreigners getting taken to the cleaners, if you get the proper legal advice before you make any agreement/commitment then you should be fine.

 

[gtrken]

I would suggest doing a consultation with a lawyer, so you know where you stand. I believe that Indonesian law gives a 50-50 split of assets in the case of a divorce. Of course the problem arises that foreigners cannot own property in Indonesia, this is the reason why most mixed couples make a pre-nup stating that property in Indonesia is owned by the Indonesian spouse. Of course you can say what you want in the pre-nup within the law, so you can write what will happen with the Indonesian property if you get a divorce, such as selling the assets.

My wife is a lawyer and she has handled many divorces during this period. My feeling is that the judges are fair and reasonable. There is a process of mediation and while you may have heard of many horror stories about foreigners getting taken to the cleaners, if you get the proper legal advice before you make any agreement/commitment then you should be fine.

Spicy , that may be the correct legal definition but I reckon my answer is closer to the mark
I work on the KISS theory...

And I think the 50-50 split of assets would include any foreign owned property/shares/bank accounts etc.
My take on it will be that as the Indonesian property will be in her name then good luck trying to force a sale of that or ever recouping the outlay.

Cheers
Not a lawyer but a realist
Ken

 

[pisangkudedek]

If you ask 1000 couples that are about to get married what about divorce ? What perccentage of them will answer "nah not us it won't happen we're too deeply in love" ? Of course they're in love, they're getting married... Yet stats say 50% of them will divorce.
To me it's just being humble enough to not consider myself above the odds. Marriage is a coinflip with a huge potential loss for the man and very little to be gained to balance that risk. So really I'm looking for reasons to not go through with this.

It's also definitely money oriented because marriage is a money decision. A loving long term relationship can happen without the state interfering.

I didnt know a prenup is worthless. Still I can't see how it can hurt to do one. Also I'm not sure it's specific to Indonesia. I've heard prenup are worthless in other parts of the world too.

So in case of a divorce you have to support your kids if you have kids but if you dont, don't you have to support your ex spouse as well ?

Yes I've heard horror stories but still it doesnt seem as bad here as in the West where in some countries women are incentivised to divorce because they are financially backed up by the state.

If the 50/50 split does concern everything I have including whats in my home country, I struggle to see how this works ? How can it can be enforced ? How can the Indonesian authorities claim 50% of my assets from a foreign country ? I mean what if after the divorce I Ieave the country, never return and ignore everything what can they do ?
By the way my girlfriend doesnt even know I have money and real estate and I like it that way. It would make me uncomfortable if I had to tell her. So if I make a prenup do I HAVE to list all of my assets from my home country ?

 

[spicyayam]

I don't believe a prenup is worthless at all and it will be required if you buy property in Indonesia.

If you get divorced in Indonesia, then for sure the courts will follow what's in the prenup.

I can't really answer your other questions which is why I would advise consulting with a lawyer.

I don't think anyone wants to think about divorce when they get married, but obviously it is something you need to plan for. The same with writing a will.

 

[Ultrafart The Brave]

You aren't even married yet and thinking about divorce?
Any prenup you do in Indonesia IMHO is not worth the paper it's printed on.
If you are going to have children you should be expected to pay for their living and full education expenses as you would expect to do in any country , Indonesia or not.
You may not have meant to but your post comes across as very money orientated ( ie. I want the fun but don't want it to cost me) .
If you are that worried about all your assets I suggest you don't marry her and keep the relationship as BF and GF , supply her with a good amount of money to keep her and be happy.

Cheers
Wait till Markit sees this
Ken

Considering that in Western countries, between people of the same culture, the divorce rate is about 50%, I think that a little forward financial planning is called for. Of course the romantics think this is awful but if he had no money, she would not marry him, so it goes both ways.

 

[Markit]

I struggle to see any good reason (other than tax) for getting married at all.

Please list your good reasons? (I'm up for a good laugh )

Myself, I've been married to the same woman since 1980 - do the math, I can't, without braking out weeping inconsolably.

If you decide to do the deed then get a prenup to cover YOUR ownership of land - funnily your Indonesian wife will also be unable to buy land in Indonesia when she's married to a foreigner without one. If someone can explain the "sense" of that to me I'd be grateful.

Do not ever tell your wife you have money/land/fortune/a pension anywhere else, ever! You may have the most loving Indonesian wife in the world but you will most likely fall under a passing truck fairly quickly - she will have a rapacious family (we all do) and they will have her (and their) best interests at heart.

If you still are set on risking your fortune, health and life to get married then consider just getting a religious marriage without the civil/legal bit attached. It saved many a mans sanity and worldly goods, not least of all Mick Jagger back in the day with the Jerry Hall divorce and is usually sufficient to satisfy the morals of her family.

If all the above isn't enough then take this final Markit lesson to heart: https://coconuts.co/bali/news/danis...or-deportation-after-serving-prison-sentence/

Have a nice day!

 

[Balifrog]

"I struggle to see any good reason (other than tax) for getting married at all."

Can't see ANY reason to marry, except :
- If you want to have kids. And even that... my first "life" in France we have a kid but were never married.
- If you want to often travel internationnally, bring your wife to your home country, or have your wife follow you when you work overseas. This was the reason I married my ex wife (Thai)
- With the actual Miss, things were made clear from the day I invited her to live together (in HK). "There will never be a marriage, no kids (she has 1, me 4, all adults), no house (she has one, I dont need one anymore). 8 years later this still stands.

But OK, we were not spring chickens madly in love on first sight, like in the movies (make that "dramas").
And dont start me on the family. It' not their business.

 

[hadodi]

If you are such negative thinker, don’t get married at all. I have been through thick and thin during our 20year marriage and never thought about stupid lawyer info, mastering all problems and so fulfilling our oath.

 

[Balifrog]

If you are such negative thinker, don’t get married at all. I have been through thick and thin during our 20year marriage and never thought about stupid lawyer info, mastering all problems and so fulfilling our oath.

- Lawyer .... Well ,it's like death, better prepare and plan for it when still alive. It avoids a mess for those left behind

- Mastering the problems : not an issue, but if things turn really bad I walk away. Peacefully as far as possible, but not only.
- Oath ? Hmmmmm.... Most of the 50% marriages who divorce took one.

 

[Ginand T]

Prenup template.
Does anyone have a template or guidelines, I dont want to be fleeced by the Notaris by going in blind. Also, where does it have to be lodged.

 

[Markit]

Prenup template.
Does anyone have a template or guidelines, I dont want to be fleeced by the Notaris by going in blind. Also, where does it have to be lodged.

You can barter with the Notary just like any other service provider. Also they have a price list issued by the government to show their prices but that is only how much they'd like to get, what you end up paying is up to you.

 

[McAdoo]

"I struggle to see any good reason (other than tax) for getting married at all."

Can't see ANY reason to marry, except :
- If you want to have kids. And even that... my first "life" in France we have a kid but were never married.
- If you want to often travel internationnally, bring your wife to your home country, or have your wife follow you when you work overseas. This was the reason I married my ex wife (Thai)
- With the actual Miss, things were made clear from the day I invited her to live together (in HK). "There will never be a marriage, no kids (she has 1, me 4, all adults), no house (she has one, I dont need one anymore). 8 years later this still stands.

But OK, we were not spring chickens madly in love on first sight, like in the movies (make that "dramas").
And dont start me on the family. It' not their business.

Hi Balifrog. I need to research the school matter for my six year old daughter (ie which school to go to). Any tips to get started on this forum ? I wouldn't mind avoiding the vitriol of the sages on this forum.

I see you were in Hong Kong, where we now are. Brit husband, Indonesian wife. Private school / bilingual school / live near school - all these issues.

Best wishes,

McAdoo

 

[AuroraB]

List of every International School in Bali

All the key information about the 22 International Schools in Bali, Indonesia: Extracurricular activies, if teachers are native, class sizes, fees, school bus availability, etc.

www.international-schools-database.com

Bali Island School in Sanur with IB curriculum was our choice.

 

[Balifrog]

Hi Balifrog. I need to research the school matter for my six year old daughter (ie which school to go to). Any tips to get started on this forum ? I wouldn't mind avoiding the vitriol of the sages on this forum.

I see you were in Hong Kong, where we now are. Brit husband, Indonesian wife. Private school / bilingual school / live near school - all these issues.

Best wishes,

McAdoo

Sorry mate, I am at an age where all my kids are already flying with their own wings, so that's a domain I can't help you.
But several on this forum will probably be able to answer your questions.

Cheers
JM

 

[McAdoo]

List of every International School in Bali

All the key information about the 22 International Schools in Bali, Indonesia: Extracurricular activies, if teachers are native, class sizes, fees, school bus availability, etc.

www.international-schools-database.com

Bali Island School in Sanur with IB curriculum was our choice.

Many thanks. I have seen that database, and your naming that school is very helpful.

Do you mind if I ply you with questions. I am new to this website.

McAdoo.

 

[AuroraB]

Many thanks. I have seen that database, and your naming that school is very helpful.

Do you mind if I ply you with questions. I am new to this website.

McAdoo.

Yes ask questions, search the form. Others might chime in with their experience/knowledge as well.

 

[murphynagari]

I'm considering getting married to my current Indo girlfriend. Obviously before taking such a decision I want to be fully aware of what I'm getting into.
How much can I expect to lose the day we divorce ?
I struggle because so far on the internet I come across contradicting informations.
My main concern is asset division after a divorce. Is there an asset separation matrimonial regime by the way ?
What I clearly need to know is what parts of my net worth are at risk ? Is it only about what I own in Indonesia or in my home country as well ?
Example : what if I own real estate in my home country ? Same question with a portfolio of stocks and bonds in a bank from my home country ?

Also what are the different things I will have to pay afterwards (pension, child support, alimony... ?) and for how many years ? How are those calculated ? The gap in wealth between her and me is huge.
She is protestant if that is relevant. I know there are differences between muslims and non-muslims.

Until you are married for 10 years have permanent visa you can't own anything .My self I was lucky to meet my wife outside of Indonesia and dated for over a year we have been married 15 years and live in Bali .
I trust her completely.
But there are thousands of horror stories out there think long and hard .my advice live with her for a while the cultural differences are huge and have one account for yourself in home country n one for Indonesia

 

[murphynagari]

Until you are married for 10 years have permanent visa you can't own anything .My self I was lucky to meet my wife outside of Indonesia and dated for over a year we have been married 15 years and live in Bali .
I trust her completely.
But there are thousands of horror stories out there think long and hard .my advice live with her for a while the cultural differences are huge and have one account for yourself in home country n one for Indonesia

Prenup template.
Does anyone have a template or guidelines, I dont want to be fleeced by the Notaris by going in blind. Also, where does it have to be lodged.

Mate Indonesia prenup gives wife everything