Bert Vierstra
Dewi's (my wife) parents are a mystery to me. I never really knew how they got their money. I paid Dewi's fathers debts with the village before we married as a gesture. (I didn't want to have the feeling that I "bought" Dewi, but it is common pratice, at least in our western eyes.) I never saw him work. Dewi's mother has a small warung, but there isn't much to buy. I sometimes gave some money, but very little. My opinion was that he was lazy, and other village people thought the same. "Yes I want to look for work, but I don't have a motorbike to do so" was not excatly a reason for me to give him one. Also the house in exchange for Dewi was never given. (this demand vanished during the marriage preparations anyway)A few weeks ago my hotel site manager Herman ( [url="http://www.balihotelguide.com"]http://www.balihotelguide.com[/url] ) said that he wanted to sell his pool table in the village, and I thought it was a good idea to buy it and give it to Dewi's father who lives next door. The idea stranded in internal village relations, I tried to find out what was going on, but never did. Some day the pool table dissappeared anyway and I waited 2 weeks and bought a new one for Dewi's father. I said everythings fine, but I am an investor, so I want 10% of the profit :). So now they save 50 rupiah from every played game for me. I will save it for them in case the pool table needs repairs.Its getting crowded behind the house of Dewi's parents, and Dewi's father seems to really like his new job, he even looks a little stressful in my eyes. Dewi's mother sells softdrinks and cigarretes. Dewi told me that her mother told her happily that they could buy bakso today in the street. I felt like a monster, why didn't I help them before?Now I just hope that the other village people don't put the pool table on fire out of jealousy, or start with black magic stuff (guna guna).As a westerner you expect a thank you when you give something, but no. I spoke with another westerner who did something special for someone, he also got no thanks. It seems normal, at least around here.http://www.bali-information.com/forumpics/billiard.jpg[/img]
Tracey
Bert, I know what you mean about no thanks... Thankfully my husbands parents have their own money & a big house. But of course when we are there, we buy dinner etc most nights even if we are going out with friends for a meal etc..They are quite Westernised living in Tuban & working with Tourists at the airport etc. I have a friend female married to a Balinese guy, for about 6 years. Thet live in Melb, Aust. She works full time for a large bank, he works when he wants to, in factories or at disco's...(?)He has over the last 5 years drawn money (approx $60,000) out of their homeloan, her signing the forms etc too..(?)To build 2 HUGE houses (one for his Mum, sisters & nieces & nephews) in his village in Singaraja. Everything to him is money, they don't have kids, but apparently are trying. He returns to Bali every 6-8 months to continue building & works on his house, for months at a time. She believes that the young lady staying with him is homeless & so he is so kind for looking after her(??)Recently the chickens on their property have all had their heads removed, dogs been poisoned & they cannot use the running water onto their properties!!!All of which my husband believes is Black Magic... Because this fool has been hiring builders etc from all the other villages except his & also from Java etc...He says he is returning in the next 2 years to build a warung & live there forever..... But without his wife...I feel very sorry for his family, because of his lack of respect for others & greediness in life, they are the ones currently dealing with the Black magic he has caused them....I think the Pool Table is a great idea & I hope does not cause any trouble for your family...
