Family planning

balikendoll

Good morning everyone er salamat malam in Indonesia. I just joined this group as my family is developing an escape plan from California. We were planning to retire in Bali, but we now have a daughter, born 8/9, that has moved our plans up. We want her to have a connection with the culture in Indonesia, as she is 1/2. I joined the group to do research, mostly on schools. We are pretty familiar with Bali as before recent events we would go every two years. I look forward to chatting with y'all. My name is Ken, my wife's name is Indah, and my daughter's name is Batavia.

sayangku

What do you mean by the culture in Indonesia? There's obviously a big difference between (say) Javanese, Balinese, Medan cultures. Which specific culture/ language do you want her to pick up?

balikendoll

I am not surprised to see an "educational" reply. I am referring to Indonesian in general, Javanese, Balinese, Medan, Papuan, Sundanese, Chinese, Ambonese. We are unconcerned with specifics. My wife is of Sundanese/Chinese/Dutch decent, but she grew up as a city girl in Jakarta and really does not adhere to specific customs or cultural norms as they apply to an ethnic group. Bali is our choice because we like it. We want Batavia to pick up Indonesian and if she can do any other language it's a bonus.

spicyayam

As you probably know there are a few international schools here and they are expensive. It also depends where you want to live. It would make sense to live in the area where your kids go to school. Many people seem to like Canggu Community School for example: https://www.ccsbali.com/

balikendoll

Hey Spicyyamyam. Thank you for putting this school on my radar. I know that the international schools are incredibly expensive, though they seem to have quite a range. We are looking into national plus schools as well. I have not actually been to Canggu yet, it is on our list for the next trip, fingers crossed hopefully it wi be August. I think the biggest concern while watching videos for this school is that it seems to use only English and not bahasa Indonesia. I think other than that the school looked great. Unfortunately I don't think site visits will be possible when we go next time. We are flexible as to where we end up. We were trying to stay away from being too far south to help avoid heavy traffic, but it seems that's where all the schools are located.

Markit

What possible benefits do you imagine knowing Indonesian will give your daughter? Bearing in mind that this is (almost) the last place on Earth I'd sentence a young girl to live that didn't just love misogynistic, male dominated 3rd world ideals. Only Saudi might be worse but even there she'd have, at least, a chance to get to know or end up in the harem of a rich Arab. Should you really have your daughters best wishes at heart (as opposed to an entirely understandable selfish wish to live here yourself) then take her to a European country and have her grow up in England or Italy. Not Bali. Should you chose to ignore my sage and experienced advise (as you no doubt will) be sure to bring a good bucket and squeegee with you that the daughter will at least learn a good trade as window cleaner which will stand her in good stead when she's finally able to return to America with her fluent Balinese and miserable education. Have a nice day :cool:

balikendoll

Markit I read you were jaded but just did not realize to what level. What you said makes sense, but how you said it doesn't. Let me explain. There are these little contraptions called airplanes that allow people to go from one place to another. Just because you live in one place does not mean you cannot move. I know you had my families best interest at heart, but saying it in a way that is meaningful and not so abrasive would allow people to hear you. The tone which you set was not one conducive for advice, but one of autofellatio. Have a nice day

Markit wrote What possible benefits do you imagine knowing Indonesian will give your daughter? Bearing in mind that this is (almost) the last place on Earth I'd sentence a young girl to live that didn't just love misogynistic, male dominated 3rd world ideals. Only Saudi might be worse but even there she'd have, at least, a chance to get to know or end up in the harem of a rich Arab. Should you really have your daughters best wishes at heart (as opposed to an entirely understandable selfish wish to live here yourself) then take her to a European country and have her grow up in England or Italy. Not Bali. Should you chose to ignore my sage and experienced advise (as you no doubt will) be sure to bring a good bucket and squeegee with you that the daughter will at least learn a good trade as window cleaner which will stand her in good stead when she's finally able to return to America with her fluent Balinese and miserable education. Have a nice day :cool: [/QUOTE

Markit

balikendoll wrote Markit I read you were jaded but just did not realize to what level. What you said makes sense, but how you said it doesn't. Let me explain. There are these little contraptions called airplanes that allow people to go from one place to another. Just because you live in one place does not mean you cannot move. I know you had my families best interest at heart, but saying it in a way that is meaningful and not so abrasive would allow people to hear you. The tone which you set was not one conducive for advice, but one of autofellatio. Have a nice day

My reply has nothing to do being jaded and everything to do with trying to shock single-minded numpties into some modicum of sense. You clearly read my offering and were offended! Job done Markit, backslapping all around. Do you imagine you are the first person to rock up here asking advice for how to bring up children in Indonesia? I also raised a daughter and know a bit about it too. I also grew up in America and know how sadly deficient the general knowledge level there is and how ignorant most of the people there are. I don't get any hardons from offending idiot Americans bent on "living the dream" regardless of what consequences it has to their families and trust me/us - we have seen sooooo many of you come and go in Bali, end up in jail, divorced, etc. etc. I truly hope you and your family have a wonderful time here and the kid(s) grow up speaking fluent Indonesian and savoring their lives here and elsewhere. Problem is in this disneyesque dream is it most probably won't end like that. If you really wanted information on how to make your dream happen then you came to the right place but you need to be aware that thousands have had the very same idea and failed miserably. If you want to hear how easy it is go on FB and ask there. People that have been here all of 3 or 4 months will tell you exactly how to do it. Me, I've only been here for 14 years and many here longer. Oh and vacations here every 2 years do not equip you to have any idea what to expect. Have a day.

Balifrog

balikendoll wrote but we now have a daughter, born 8/9, that has moved our plans up. We want her to have a connection with the culture in Indonesia, as she is 1/2

Not sure how to read this, she is 8 or 9 y old or born on 9th August. If she is born on 9th August, and if you do not have the means to send her to a good International school in Bali, stay in the US. Dont worry about her "bicultural" education. She can always pick that up later. What you want to avoid is her being brainwashed here with all the religious and superstition stuff. FYI : I have been married 15 y with a Thai, 3 kids. We moved back to France when the eldest was 5. They all went to school in France, and when we moved back to Thailand 10 y later (for the job) their basic education was set in stone, no Budha and King brainwashing was going to change them. They continued their education in a decent Thai school. They are now adult, eldest 26 in the Army in France, the 2 others live in BKK. Daugther 21 has her on line food business, boy 22 in UNI (computer science). They all speak / write fluent French, English, Thai. They have ZERO interest in any religion,and zero interest in traditionnal Thai culture, and zero interest in extended family obligations. Their mind is clearly western orientated, even if they know very well how to play they "Eurasian" thing. Behaving Asian when it suits them, and Western when it suits them. Markit has maybe expressed it a bit "direct" but I agree with him. This (or Thailand) is NOT paradise, stop dreaming, and think about your kid(s) future. Note : For YOUR retirement Bali is not paradise, but a very decent compromise.

balikendoll

Balifrog wrote Not sure how to read this, she is 8 or 9 y old or born on 9th August. If she is born on 9th August, and if you do not have the means to send her to a good International school in Bali, stay in the US. Dont worry about her "bicultural" education. She can always pick that up later. What you want to avoid is her being brainwashed here with all the religious and superstition stuff. FYI : I have been married 15 y with a Thai, 3 kids. We moved back to France when the eldest was 5. They all went to school in France, and when we moved back to Thailand 10 y later (for the job) their basic education was set in stone, no Budha and King brainwashing was going to change them. They continued their education in a decent Thai school. They are now adult, eldest 26 in the Army in France, the 2 others live in BKK. Daugther 21 has her on line food business, boy 22 in UNI (computer science). They all speak / write fluent French, English, Thai. They have ZERO interest in any religion,and zero interest in traditionnal Thai culture, and zero interest in extended family obligations. Their mind is clearly western orientated, even if they know very well how to play they "Eurasian" thing. Behaving Asian when it suits them, and Western when it suits them. Markit has maybe expressed it a bit "direct" but I agree with him. This (or Thailand) is NOT paradise, stop dreaming, and think about your kid(s) future. Note : For YOUR retirement Bali is not paradise, but a very decent compromise.

Thanks Balifrog. This is a much more constructive post than the previous, thank you for that. I understand the desire to be devoid of brain washing, I come from the southern US where they have their own brand of politics and religion. I now live in California where they also have their own brand of politics. In both places I feel people have lost their minds and have the inability to compromise or moderate. Thank you for your own examples, we truly appreciate them. My wife grew up in Indonesia and has expressed similar concerns and we are developing solutions. We do intend on maintaining a residency in the USA and my daughter would be a dual citizen, obviously until she is 18.

sayangku

Indonesia tax you on world wide income, not just income in Indonesia. Of course, they are not as effective as the IRS in finding out what your overseas income is, but if you are claiming double taxation deductions, the two taxation filings (US and Indonesia) should probably match... One for a specialised accountant.

sayangku

OK, so your best bet is probably a national plus school, rather than a full-fat international school. Cheaper, and she will be surrounded by Indonesians so will pick up the language fast. Obvious things are obvious - as an American you will have to file both US federal and Indonesian taxes, which is a pain, but not knowing your income, probably you will only need to pay Indonesian tax. But maintaining 'residency' in the US I guess means you will still be liable for california state taxes? Talk to a good tax accountant who is familiar with US citizens living overseas. Presumably you will be on a spousal KITAS? This isn't a work permit, but a grey area is that you can help your wife if she has a business. (Private) Health care in Bali is the best in Indonesia, but you'll need decent health insurance to pay for it.

JackStraw

Since you're from California, I think your kids would fit right in at the communist training academy they call "The Green School." Give it a Goog.

balikendoll

Good morning Sayangku. That's what I have been researching is the national plus schools. I think the highest concentration of them are in the south, which does limit our choices on where to live unfortunately. I do have to think about the tax implications. From my understanding Indonesia has a tax treaty with the USA and we would not be required to pay double tax in both countries, at least not for monies made outside of Indonesia. To clarify we would have a residence and not necessarily maintain residency. We have a he in a touristy part of California that we use as a vacation rental. I also have to look into how a kitas would work for me. Luckily for me my healthcare is handled through the veteran administration. I would fly into Manila for my primary care stuff, but I will need to figure out insurance for emergency care and primary care for the rest of my family. This is also a motivator for going, my wife's father is not in the best of health and he does not want to come to the US. Luckily my parents are showing an interesting moving to Bali as well.

balikendoll

JackStraw wrote Since you're from California, I think your kids would fit right in at the communist training academy they call "The Green School." Give it a Goog.

Haha. As soon as I saw vegan meals I crossed that one off the list.

JackStraw

balikendoll wrote Haha. As soon as I saw vegan meals I crossed that one off the list.

I like your style. Welcome to Bali mate :)

McAdoo

balikendoll wrote Hey Spicyyamyam. Thank you for putting this school on my radar. I know that the international schools are incredibly expensive, though they seem to have quite a range. We are looking into national plus schools as well. I have not actually been to Canggu yet, it is on our list for the next trip, fingers crossed hopefully it wi be August. I think the biggest concern while watching videos for this school is that it seems to use only English and not bahasa Indonesia. I think other than that the school looked great. Unfortunately I don't think site visits will be possible when we go next time. We are flexible as to where we end up. We were trying to stay away from being too far south to help avoid heavy traffic, but it seems that's where all the schools are located.

Hi balikendoll. I was interested in your original posting of Dec 4, 2021, which is recent on this forum as these things go (and not so interested in the discussion that followed here). I am in the same boat with a daughter looking for a school and would be interested in communicating with you, possibly by email initially. Any chance you can get back to me ? You probably know this site much better than me. I will look under Members and see if I can contact you there. Best wishes, McAdoo.

balikendoll wrote Good morning everyone er salamat malam in Indonesia. I just joined this group as my family is developing an escape plan from California. We were planning to retire in Bali, but we now have a daughter, born 8/9, that has moved our plans up. We want her to have a connection with the culture in Indonesia, as she is 1/2. I joined the group to do research, mostly on schools. We are pretty familiar with Bali as before recent events we would go every two years. I look forward to chatting with y'all. My name is Ken, my wife's name is Indah, and my daughter's name is Batavia.