Bali Expat Forum - Bali Travel Forum

Bert wrote:Prostitution is bad. It keeps women dependent, leads to exploitation, people trafficking, not to mention the STD's.

I disagree with you here Bert because this is generalizing what you are doing.

What about the people who choose to be a prostitute? I personally know at least 3 ladies who used to be prostitutes to make money so they could go to university. Their families did not have enough money to pay for that and you know very well the Dutch government is not really helpful sending people to university. Yeah you can lend a small amount of money which you have to pay back with interest but that never is enough to pay for university.

It keeps them dependent? Well it made those ladies very independent and they got a great career now making a lot of money.
STD's? Ever heard of condoms? Maybe you can go without condoms somewhere on a crack whore behind central station but not with normal prostitutes.

Forced prostitution is bad, I agree but my opinion is that prostitution is a good thing.

Interesting subject
Regards preconceved thoughts.
When My family moved to Calif. (we are all Indonesian) My brother who was the darkest of all(dark skin-black hair black eyes) of us got the worst of the abuse from the school kids,That poor guy was an unhappy soul. I was lucky I had the lightest skin /blue-grey eyes.

But I find that time heals,california now is a massive melting pot of all imigrants,everyone and anyone is accepted all colors of skin.People learn to be accepting..........

The age issue is not a problem here like in Bali- Many many couples of extreme age differences,no one cares. I am married to an American Indian "asteca S. American Indian lineage" (that looks Balinese) 13 yrs younger than myself- NOt one stare,never had a problem.

yes ... it´s very interesting subject ...
at the beginning my relationship to my husband (1989) was very hard for me, than i must show other people that i´m not bad girl like they thinking about. it was one or more bad comment behind our back, or question from taxi driver: " In which hotel shall we go?". We have 3 years relationship before we marriage on 1993...One day, we had dinner in one nice restaurant in Bandung, while my husband went to the toillette, i had visit from indonesian men, he ask me: How much he can pay to have my service. I don´t know, what can i answer him... i just showed my finger and said "Kurang ajar!"...I have problem with cuss word in every language, eventough in my language.

IN Madrid i had similar experience... after i said goodbye to my husband, he had bussines trip... i was on busstop waiting for bus to the city. One man -normal, polite appearance- began small talk, asked me, where i came from and who was i brought to airport. I told him, that i brougt my husband ... i hope he respect me as marriage woman. I became schocking answer: Good idea, you are now alone ... i can show you Madrid etc... I didn´t have any cuss word in spanish... i run to pick up taxi to go home... very very sad and ask me why?
My appereance is normal, my clothes, ...

After this experience i spoke with other woman from different culture. I learn cuss words... i had good advice from this circle. One advice from italian woman was very funny ... but she say would be good work ...
To answer "How much?":
-Same price like your mother offert.

Now i feel very strong to defend me self with words.- The experience make me strong too... and go to hell with comment behind me. As Binational couple I feel better in Bali than in the other parts Indonesia...

Salam and enjoy your sunday,
Dyah

It's funny you should mention that we don't know how to swear. That is really true, folks! In Indonesia, the women do not swear and if the men must, then they'd use words like: brengsek, bang..t., which doesn't mean anything but just an expression of anger, that's all.
In my family, since they also speak Dutch, if my brothers really are really really angry then they'd use a Dutch term.

Living in Italy, I'm afraid to say that out of 10 words uttered, it is so very common here to hear 5 or 6 of the words are foul. It's part of the culture here; a way of expressing oneself.
In fact, in Rome there's a restaurant called: "Le Parolacce" means "The Bad Words", where as customers, you'll be deliberately verbally abused by the owner and the workers there. Needless to say that I've never walked in there.

Until now, I don't use it at all as it's just not in my system, believe me.

Good teaching by that Italian friend on what to answer back whenever you encounter these "up-to-no-good men".

I would also like to talk about preconceived ideas from people who judge mixed marriages. Many people think that the Indonesian is marrying the bule for their money.

This is the part I find insulting. In my case they could not be more mistaken and why do I have to justify my relationship, the truth is I don't.

The truth is, and I think I have said this before, Indonesians do not necessarily look at beauty/handsome, old/young, skinny/fat, bald/hairy or even money. They look at the persons heart, their actions. their maturity in situations, stability and what kind of future they can have with this person.

Totally different values to Western people and that is why some of us westerners, men and women fall in love with Indonesians/Asians people.

I know why I fell in love with my wife but I have no idea to this day why she loved me back. I spend all my time just thanking God she does.

Oh, Jimbo, you're so modest!