Thread: Truth, Justice and Harmony

Sorry to hear it Bert, must be very difficult.... sitting there in front of him... can you ask permission to crack him in the head one good time??? tell them you too have a sickness, and the only cure is to crack him in the head a few times, it would cure you and make you feel better!! wait , I feel it coming on myself, bert your sickness must be contagious... Again sorry to hear it.. Frog

Hi Bert
When I read your stoey my hart was crying. In my years in Bali I have heard a lot of this stories and only a few days ago I had a discusion with my husband about this subjekt, how we can influens the village to go to the police. I have herd stories about rape and abuse where the village had taken care of the problem. I think its a good thing you get involved, because we can learn locals that this had to go to the police.
I have heard stories where the girl had to marry the raipist, it makes me cry.

Truly heartbreaking, how anyone can contemplate hurting a child is completely reprehensible to me, you showed good sense and self control.

Sorry Bert, but by now you should know the cardinal rule of successful expat life in Bali, which is, to keep your nose out of Balinese business, especially this kind of business, unless it involves your immediate family.

I too find it very hard sometimes to listen to Eri, but in the end of all the sticky things we have been through, her initial advice and manner of handling the situation has always been the best. I agree that sometimes it is near impossible to go against the grain of who we are, and the way we were raised, and what we can or cannot tolerate, but issues like you bring up are in fact best left for the Balinese to handle in their way, and without our intervention, which will almost be guaranteed to be later seen as interference.

Bringing the police into a situation like this right off, is a huge mistake. Problems like this, within the Balinese community, are best handled within the banjar.

I am not trying to get too personal here, but as I read your post, and put myself in your sandals, your wife Dewi offered you the best advise she could, and I have no doubt that my wife would have done the same, viz, "let them handle it". Our Balinese wives are our best guides and to some extent, protectors in many ways. While it is not always easy, we could both benefit from listening to them more often.

While you and I would agree somewhat, that justice has not been done, in many ways it has. This man has been totally dishonored within his village, and to pay for his crime, he gets to continue to live there in total shame...his reputation and “face” annihilated by the process of adat within his village. The reason the polda (police) backed off is because they know very well that banjar justice is swift and far more effective than any court.

My advice is that the next time you find yourself in the middle of this kind of issue, leave it to Dewi to handle.

A dreadful but not unusual scenario, not only in Bali but in many places throughout Indonesia.

This subject has appeared on this very forum before. I vaguely recall even yourself asking how widespread child prostitution is around Bali. I'm ashamed to admit this but Putu Sri's story is just one of many. How many, I don't exactly know. I'm ashamed because when I first came across incidents like this, (a long time ago), I had a choice, too. Whether or not to 'get involved' and push poor families to do something. In one particular example, some local police were the transgressors. What could the Balinese families whose children had been violated actually do? Report it to the violators? Go 'higher'? With both no money and very little 'education'?

Two coincidences occurred earlier today, in relation to this topic. I watched a Discovery Channel programme called 'Guilty or Innocent?' It was about an alleged children abuse case in the USA and two people were sentenced to very long prison terms (like 5 life-terms, etc) and the 'evidence' didn't really stack up. (No medical evidence of any kind, clean lie-detector results, conflicting testimonies from the children involved.) In the end, some of the parents of the alleged victims each got US 1.5 million dollars, settled out of court. Of course, there's no way I can vouch for the veracity of all this, but bungling shit does happen in the West. Imagine what could/does happen here, in Indonesia?

The second coincidence was when I read today's on-line version of The Jakarta Post.

...State to blame for child abuse, says report...

Here are a few snippets from that article:

"...In Indonesia...children are still seen as objects, facing a range of abuses, often at the hands of their families and the state...

...In its year-end report...the National Commission for Child Protection, said that nearly 13.5 million Indonesian children had suffered human rights violations over the last year...

...The state is still reluctant to place the problems of children on a parallel with the issues of politics and the economy, even through their responsibility to protect the children is stipulated in the Constitution...

...The commission also saw the abandonment of children by the state in the nation's television programming. It said that 62 percent of its content, both TV programs and commercials, incited violence...

...On the other hand, there is the exciting fact that people no longer see cases of sexual abuse as embarrassing. Even more parents are filing reports with us about sexual abuse their children have suffered...

...The commission has urged the government to establish a ministry for children, allocate 20 percent of the state budget to education as the Constitution mandates, provide free education and health services and stop the media from showing violence, mysticism and pornography..."

Food for thought there. And Bert, have you talked to Gloria about this? She might have some ideas/tactics. Worth a try, especially since you've inadvertently made yourself some kind of 'target'.

:cry:

Bert, you cannot get more agreement from me that this behavior is not to be tolerated, or accepted. My point, perhaps to found within the lines of my first response, is that for us expats to become directly involved in this sort of matter, unless it involves a direct relative, is potentially very dangerous. I’m only calling for caution and reason as you balance the potential long term actions your direct involvement may include.

Drawing on another metaphor or euphemism, you are directing your energy and resources far too much to win this battle, where you should concentrate on the war itself.

I take this abuse of kids very, very seriously. If it ever happened to one of my own, I’d simply kill the SOB and my village would back me up 100%. Even then, the police would never be called in. Justice dari kampung is very effective, and I personally would rely on it far more than any regency or provincial court.